Trade Deadline one-liners

The Rockets-Kings-Suns 3-team deal starring Thomas Robinson

Houston: Taking advantage of broke, desperate owners is fun!

Sacramento: Is it possible to trade the Maloofs for two crash test dummies?

Phoenix: They realized they already had a Morris twin, right?

Heat trade Dexter Pittman for the rights to Ricky Sanchez

Miami: Ricky Sanchez is an Argentinian who will never play for the Heat, not a South Beach club promoter. 

Memphis: Dexter Pittman now gives Lionel Hollins a very large (literally) reason not to play Ed Davis.

Hawks acquire Jeremy Tyler

Atlanta: The Hawks pregame layup line just received a massive boost.

Golden State: Given Tyler is one of two players traded for “draft consideration,” I’m guessing they’re hoping the draft is very considerate to them.

The Warriors send Charles Jenkins to the 76ers

Philadelphia: This may not be the incredible feat it sounds like, but Jenkins should prove to be a big improvement in Philly’s backup point guard spot.

Golden State: See Above

Hawks swap Anthony Morrow for Dahntay Jones

Dallas: Mavs get a dude that can shoot the hell out of the ball for a dude that even Rick Carlisle couldn’t figure out how to use regularly.

Hawks: He’ll have a hard time taking minutes from John Jenkins and DeShawn Stevenson, seriously.

Bobcats acquire Josh McRoberts for Hakim Warrick

Charlotte: The team’s power forwards have been so brutal that Josh McRoberts might look like the second coming of Larry Johnson in Charlotte.

Orlando: Meh.

Celtics send Leandro Barbosa and Jason Collins to the Wiz for Jordan Crawford

Boston: Crawford could actually be a great acquisition the C’s, especially if inserted into the starting lineup right off the bat where perhaps KG’s glare can tone down his gunning ways. 

Washington: Collins will prove useful should the Wiz play Dwight Howard and the Lakers in the Finals.

Knicks send Ronnie Brewer to the Thunder

Oklahoma City: A clever acquisition given Brewer matches up better with Dwyane Wade and LeBron James better than anyone currently on the roster.

New York: Yea, I don’t know why either.

Eric Maynor to the Blazers

Portland: Maynor should help a brutal bench unit, but there’s no denying that he’s been far from stellar since coming back from an ACL injury.

OKC: Given his track record, Sam Presti will likely turn this trade exception into 15 first round picks.

The Bucks acquire JJ Redick

Milwaukee: A solid deal that becomes great if the team can magically make Monta disappear.

Orlando: An expiring contract, a young player with questionable work habits (Doron Lamb) and even younger one without a position (Tobias Harris) is a deal hardly worth getting excited over.

Related posts:

  1. HoopSpeak Live 40 – Trade Deadline Bonanza: The Clips
  2. Assessing the collateral damage of the rumored Carmelo Anthony trade
  3. Three more thoughts on the Rudy Gay trade
  4. The big trade that makes too much sense
  5. Dream trade: How Steve Nash to the Clippers could work

Trackbacks

  1. [...] – After the trade deadline, HoopSpeak came out with a few one-liners about the deals. Naturally, the Rockets were at the top of the list: The Rockets-Kings-Suns 3-team [...]

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